THATS RIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!
You only need to ASK ME and you'll get to be on my SECRET AWESOME INSIDE FRIENDS LIST THAT NOONE ELSE CAN BE ON BECAUSE THEY'LL NEVER GET ON IT FAGGOTS YEAH SIGN UP TODAY AND GET A FREE BAG OF MEMBERSHIP YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT DO IT DO IT YEAH AWESOME TOTALLY DUDE!!!!!!11!!1one!!1!

PEOPLE ON MY LIST NAO-LOOK AT THEM, THEY OBVIOUSLY HAVE BIGGER PENISES THAN YOU BUT YOU CAN BE AS BIG AS THEM BY SIGNING UP FOR THE LIST YEAH WOAH WOAH WOAH AWESOME.

portugal1 THIS GUYS IS AMAZING LOOK AT HIM AND HOW HE'S ON MY FRIENDS LIST

Elder500 HOLY SHIT THIS ONE IS LIKE THE BEST PERSON ON HERE HE'S SO MUCH MORE AWESOME THAN EVERYONE ELSE APART FROM ALL THE OTHER ONES WHAT.

TheSmegOMG HE CALLED THE QUIZ USELESS BUT THATS ARIGHT BECAUSE HE HAS AN EXPONENTIALLY LARGE COCK THAT YOU WANT TO SUCK UNLESS YOU'RE ON THIS LIST YEAH!!!

arctic-zone HOLY SHIT THIS GUY COULD EASILY BE EVERY PERSON ON THIS LIST, THATS HOW AMAZING HE IS YEAH DUDE YEAH

mwmike WOAH THIS GUY IS LIKE COCK-SPANKINGLY AWESOME DUDE YOU SO SHOULD SO TOTALLY LIKE LOOK AT HIM EVEN BEFORE YOU READ ALL THIS TEXT YEAH YEAH YEAH MAN

jtm17 BEFORE HE WAS HERE THIS LIST SUCKED BUT NOWS HE'S MADE IT A BILLION TIMES COOLER AND ALSO SO ARE THE PEOPLE ON THE LIST ALREADY AWESOME WOAH YEAH RADICAL

sirtom93 DUDE THIS GUY IS LIKE THE ONLY ONE PERSON ON THIS LIST DUE TO HIS AWESOME EVERYONE ELSE WOULDN'T BE HERE IF THIS GUY HAD'NT TOLD ME TO PUT THEM UP BECAUSE HE'S SO CHIPMUNK-RAPINGLY COOL AND I DID IT MAN MAN MAN MAN MAN.

ZachMM OH DEAR LORDY JESUS CHRIST IN A BUCKET IGNORE EVERYTHING ELSE I SAID APART FROM EVERYTHING ELSE BECAUSE THIS GUY IS THE VERY PINNACLE OF AWESOME COOL AND DUDE.

the-dz WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH HOLD UP THIS GUY HAS CHANGED EVERYTHING WITH HIS WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF COOL YOU THOUGHT THAT THAT ACTOR WHO YOU JACK OFF TO EVERY NIGHT WAS COOL WELL YOU AINT SEEN NOTHING YET.

McJesus HOLY FUCK YOU SHOULD BE HONORED JUST TO BE ABLE TO SEE A TINY GLIMPSE OF THE PURE MIND-BLOWINGLY COOL SHIT THAT THIS GUY EXUDES AT A RATE YOU CANNOT EVEN DREAM OF MAN.

Jon4life OH DEAR LORD THIS ONE IS IT, THE BEST ONE YET MAN APART FROM THE OTHER ONES YOU KNOW I'M TALKING ABOUT HE'S SO AMAZING THAT IF YOU LOOK DIRECTLY AT HIS USERPAGE ALONE FOR TOO LONG YOUR FACE WILL MELT LIKE THAT NAZI FROM INDIANA JONES MAN YEAH

SBB DUDE THIS GUY IS TOTALLY AWESORADICALICIOUS THE FACT HE'S A MOD IS NOW INSIGNIFICANT BECAUSE HE'S ON THIS LIST BITCHES YEAH COOL TOTALLY MAN THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN EVER HOPE TO BE AS COOL AS THIS

super-sense OH MAN HOLY FUCK THIS GUY IS SO SUPER THAT YOU DONT EVEN NEED TO SEE THAT HE HAS SUPER IN HIS NAME BUT HE'S NOT JUST SUPER SUPER SUPER SUPER HE'S ALSO TOTALLY AWESOME WOAH MAN TOTAL COOL

KP94 OH WOW DUDE CHECK THIS OUT ITS LIKE HE'S THE BEST POSSIBLE PERSON EVER THE SUN DOESN'T JUST SHINE OUT HIS ARSE YOU COULD SO FAR AS TO SAY HE EMITS CONCENTRATED LAZERS FROM EVERY SINGLE BODILY ORIFICE.

AsthmaticHamster JESUS CHRIST THIS GUY COULD QUITE POSSIBLY BE THE EPITOME OF AWESOME COOL SUPER WOW YEAH AWESOME YOU MAY AS WELL KILL YOURSELF NOW YOUR LIFE WILL NEVER GET BETTER THAN LOOKING AT THIS DUDE.

SonicSheep HOOOOOOLD THE FUCKING SHIT UP MAN!!!!!!!!! THIS GUY IS THE BEST GUY EVER IN ALL DIMENSIONS OF SPACE AND TIME ITS ALMOST INCONCEIVABLE TO EVEN BEGIN TO UNDERSTAND THE AWESOME CONTAINED HERE

Kagoe WOAH MAN IF YOU CLICK THAT LINK YOUR COMPUTER MAY NOT BE ABLE TO HANDLE THE AWESOME THAT IT LEADS TO UNLESS YOUR COMPUTER IS A 9001 SUPER MOTHERFUCKING DUPER SHITSTORM RAPIST 50000000000000 DUDE DUDE DUDE DUDE DUDE DUDE WAIT YOU HATE ME WHAT NOW

Tiki-Dog NO WAY IN HEAVEN EARTH LIMBO HELL OR INDEED ANY PLANE OF EXISTENCE COULD ANYONE APART FROM THE GUYS ON THIS LIST COME CLOSE TO THE COOL AND NO WAI FACTOR OF THIS ONE JESUS CHRIST ON A BIKE THIS IS AWESOME GODAMM IT

solardave DUDE YOU'LL PROBABLY WANT TO FUCKING KILL YOURSELF AFTER SEEING THIS GUY KNOWING THAT NOTHING YOU EVER DO IN LIFE WILL MAKE YOU AS AWESOME SUPER PARTY PARTY PARTY
AS HIM YEAH MAN UNLESS YOU'RE ON THE LIST MAN

joabos BECAUSE IF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE WAS AS BADDASS AND AWESOME AS THIS GUY IT WOULD PROBABLY OVERLOAD AND THERE'D BE A CELESTIAL BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH SO BE GLAD YOU'RE NOT AS COOL AS THIS GUY YOU CAN STILL LOOK UP TO HIM IN INFINITE WONDER THOUGH

xTOXICxEMPIRE W-W-W-WOAAAAAHHHHHH JUST LOOKING AT THIS GUY IS LIKE HAVING YOUR BRAIN SMASHED IN WITH A GIANT BRICK MADE OF AWESOME MAN I BET YOU WERE ON THIS LIST NOW HUH YEAH DUDE

Transformer DUDE THIS GUY MAKES EVERYONE YOU EVER LOOKED UP TO BE IT OPTIMUS PRIME BRUCE WILLIS OR YOUR DAD LOOK LIKE DRIED FAECES SNORTING FUCKWITS BECAUSE DAMMIT THIS IS THE PINNACLE OF HOLY CRAP AWESOME YEAH

H-K-S THIS COLOSSAL PILE OF PURE FUCK YEAH FACTOR PROBABLY CAME FROM ANOTHER DIMENSION OR SOME SHIT BECAUSE I CAN SEE NO WAY THAT THIS AMOUNT OF INCREDIBLE AWESOME COULD BE CONCEIVED ON THIS PIECE OF SHIT PLANET MAN

groundpwndr WATCHING THIS DUDE IS LIKE ORGASMS FOR YOUR EYES MAN SOSOSOSOSOSOSO AWESOME THAT YOU'VE PROBABLY ALREADY BROKEN DOWN WITH THE DEPRESSION OF YOUR NONAWESOMENESS HAVENT YOU EH

Scuzzfest THERE IS NO GOD OR RATHER THERE CANNOT BE ANY HIGHER POWER THAN THIS TOTALLY CHAINSAW DEVOURINGLY AWESOME DUDE MAN YEAH SUPER PARTY COOL DUDE TOTALLY

Racoonmario YOU KNOW IF YOU WERE TO LIVE THE LIFE OF THIS GUY FOR ONE DAY I ASSURE YOU YOU COULD IN NO WAY MAKE IT SEEM AS FUCKING MIND-TWISTINGLY A-A-A-A-A-AWESOME AS HE CAN ALREADY JUST BECAUSE THAT IS THE WAY HE ROLLS MAN

Kyothine NO WAY THIS GUY IS BETTER THAN EVERYONE ON THIS LIST EXCEPT FOR ALL THE PEOPLE ON THE LIST WOAH DUDE YEAH MAN COOL

NoodleCreme REMEMBER THAT FILM WERE YOU THOUGHT OH MY GOD IT DOESNT GET ANY MORE AWESOME THAN THIS WELL THIS GUY WILL SHIT ALL OVER YOUR FILM WHILST SIMULTANEOUSLY MAKING YOUR BRAIN EXPLODE WITH HIS ACOOLSOMENESS HE'S SO COOL IMMA LET HIM SAY WHAT HE LIKES ABOUT ME JUST BECAUSE ATTENTION FROM HIM IS SIMPLY THE BEST THING A MAN CAN EVER HOPE FOR YEAH

kornrox IF THIS GUY EVER TURNS ON US THEN WE ARE ALL FUCKED BUT WE'LL BE ABLE TO DIE HAPPY BECAUSE WE'VE SEEN EVEN JUST A TNY GLIMPSE OF THE PURE AWESOME HERE

Jon4life IF THIS GUY HAD A TWIN AND THEY GOT INTO THAT LARGE HADRON COLLIDER SHIT AND SPAN ROUND AND HIT EACH OTHER THE RESULTING PARTICLE OF AWESOME WOULDN'T JUST CREAT A BLACK HOLE IT'D FUCKING MAKE A RAINBOW HOLE THAT WOULD RAPE YOUR BRAIN WITH AWESOME BEFORE SUCKING YOU IN MAN YEAH

ChocEliteBar MAN JUST TO LOOK AT THIS GUY YOU SHOULD BE PREPARED TO KILL YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY AND DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU EVER OWNED BECAUSE YEAH YEAH YEAH MAN FUCK

Kunera H-H-H-H-HOLY COW MOLESTING SHIT THIS DUDE IS AWESOME BUT EVEN MORE AWESOME DUE TO THE BEING ON THE LIST MAN THIS LIST IS COOL YEAH

Rig NO MOTHERFUCKING WAY NOT JUST IS THE COOLEST AUDIO MOD EVAR ON THE LIST OF AWESOME BUT THE COOLEST GUY WITH A THREE CHARACTER NAME ON NEWGROUNDS YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO EVEN LOOK AT THE NAME BITCH

GoldBloodedDragon FUCK YOU MAN THIS GUY IS EVEN MORE AWESOME THAN THAT TIME I SAID THE OTHER GUY WAS AWESOME JESUS MY EYES ARE BLEEDING JUST FROM EVEN THINKING ABOUT THE HOL-SHI-LOOK AT THAT AWESOMENESS FACTOR HERE FUCK YOU

Spaghetti14 FIND THE MOST INSANELY COOL THING YOU HAVE, MIX IT WITH THE BLOOD OF DRAGONS AND THE SEMEN OF VIKINGS BEFORE PUSHING I UP YOUR BUTT AND YOU MAY BEGIN TO GET A VAGUE TWINKLING OF THE AWESOME THAT IS THIS DUDE

Llizzardis OH GOD THIS IS IT, THE DEFINITION OF THE SUPER-SECRET AWESOME N THIS LIST APART FROM ALL THE OTHER ONES HOLY CRAP WOAH MAN IF THERE WAS A PLANET POPULATED BY PEOPLE THIS AWESOME THEN THE REST OF THE UNIVERSE WOULD KILL ITSELF FROM ITS SHEER RELATIVE FAILURE

RobotTaco ARE ROBOTS AWESOME? YES! ARE TACOS AWESOME? YES! MIX THESE TWO THINGS WITH EVERYTHING ELSE AWESOME THERE EVER HAS BEEN AND WILL BE AND YOU GET THIS HUMONGOUS PILE OF GODLINESS MAN!!!

Black-Ops NO WAY MAN THIS DUDE HAS EVERYTHING GOING FOR HIM THE WORLD IS NOW BLACK AND GREY TO ME BECAUSE I AM UNLIKELY EVER TO LAY MY EYES ON ANYTHING QUITE LIKE THIS MAN EVER EVER EVER EVER

iMiserableWOAH NOW YOU KNOW THAT PLAY LES MISERABLES WELL THAT WAS NOT COOL OR INTERESTING AT ALL BUT CONVERSELY THIS GUY IS LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF THAT BECAUSE DAMN HE IS AS FULLY AWESOME AS ONE COULD EVER BE YEAH

cHunter THIS GUY IS LIKE MY MOST AWESOME FRIEND ON THE LIST IN THIS EXACT POSITION WOAH MAN HOLY CRAP YOU LOVE HIM AND YOU HATE YOURSELF FOR YOUR FAILURE YOU STUPID MORON HAHAHAHAHA

In other news, nerds and other socially incompetent people worldwide can rejoice, there is now a definitive unquestionable guide on how to be cool.

I'm going to go down the ghetto and try his tips on all my homies.